In the Beginning - V.2

Over eight years ago, I left my home, my family and my country to follow a boy and live a new life as an expat.

Tonight, that boy has just boarded a train and is leaving his home, his family and his country to go live a new life as an expat.

And I am still here.


Although we knew this was coming and that I wouldn't be able to follow him to London immediately, it's was still pretty strange to think of Hubby as permanently away from me and our little home. He asked me last night before he boarded the Eurostar if I didn't find it as hard as he was finding it and I have to say that in the moment I didn't. To me it felt like he was leaving for a two week seminar or project somewhere else. I mean, I was still going to go back home to our apartment filled with our stuff and furniture and I knew that I would be seeing him again in a couple weeks when we go visit, it just didn't feel so strange to me as it must have to him, who was carrying all his clothes and personal possessions in a few suitcases.

But then I got home and went to our room and opened our closet and that's when it hit me. He's left. He's never coming back to this house. We are never going to argue about closet space again. Or about making THIS bed. Or about cooking in THIS kitchen. I am never going to snuggle with him in the sofa while watching Dr House in this living room ever again. He's left.

I guess I would have been okay after a little while but all the same, good thing my Car is currently visiting in Paris. Car got here over a week ago and is staying into late July which means I wont be so alone in the coming weeks. Good thing too.

It's been fun having her around and it's even buffered up the days leading up to tonight. Every day, she comes home from a long day of exploring Paris while we (and from now on only I) have been at work. She'll describe her day with huge twinkling eyes and show me her traveling notebook full of notes and bulging with ticket stubs. She's loving the city and I'm really glad, because as you all know, that may not always be the case.

I'm still not trying to think what I'm going to do when Car goes back home and I really find myself alone here. I don't mind being home alone for a few days, but 6 o 8 weeks is something I'm not really looking forward to. The last time Hubby and I were separated that long was, duh... never!

So I'm focusing on trying to find a job in London so I can join him as soon as possible. We decided it would be better if I tried to get transfered from my company to our London offices instead of up and quitting and starting over, even if this meant that I would have to stay behind while this happened. We set September as our time limit and if I haven't found anything by then, then I will quit and go over there and start over, as I told my boss. But hopefully this wont be the case. I really rather stay in the company I work for.

And as if all this wasn't enough, France, Mexico and the United States have all been eliminated from the World Cup!!!!

Life sucks sometimes.

Fned.